July 08, 2008
So......I invited a co-worker over last night to change the door knobs on the house. We want everything to work with the same key, and the old locks were feeble and required different keys, etc. He agreed and came over to find a challenge bigger than he imagined. The new locks wouldn't align, etc. So he fussed and we ended up fixing the locks with the pop tabs from soda cans. Such clever lock fixers we can be when we don't want to make a run to the hardware store.
In the meantime, Roomie cooked spaghetti. I was in charge of the bread. I always get the idiot jobs and that's fine. Someobdy's gotta do them.
I think "idiot" is the operative word here. I put the bread in the oven in its handy-dandy bag that is acceptable for oven use. For some reason, it didn't work this time. Within a few minutes, the oven was smoking.
"Poolie! The bread is burning!"
Aha! I grabbed the oven mitts and yanked that nasty almost-burned bread out of the oven!
TA DA!
In my haste to toss it safely away, I actually pushed it into the open flame on the stove - where the noodles were still cooking. And yes, the bag started on fire!
TA DA!
So I grabbed the burning bag and tossed it into the sink. The actual bread rolled into the sink but the bag burned rather nicely. Roomie started yelling about getting the flames out of the house, so I grabbed the now-really-flaming bag out of the sink and flung it to the floor in the garage.
TA DA!
It burned itself out on the floor of the garage, but large charred paper wafty things were floating all over the place. It was like black snow. Waft waft waft went the black papery residue all over the kitchen and the garage.
There was no harm done and I laughed my ass off, but that is proof positive that I should stay away from ovens. Or maybe they shouldn't tell you it's okay to warm your French bread in those bag things, eh?
So.....in just one short week, I've already managed to start a kitchen fire in the new house. I started the oven mitts on fire in the old house, but that didn't result in any wafting burnt paper residue. It wasn't nearly as exciting and nothing was flung to the garage floor.
Oh God.
Okay.....
I have a giant old dictionary that has been in my family since 1950. I have lugged it with me since I left home for college. Every now and then, I look up a cool word.
Let's play the ON-LINE JOURNALIST DICTIONARY game. Here is the cool word of the day. And here are the rules.
Guess a definition. No fair Googling!
The word is: heaumer
If you know the definition, you cannot be a smart-ass and say the right thing. This is all about guessing and having fun.
So have some fun. That's what comments are for.
