July 05, 2008
I got this book at Borders today. Since I haven't unpacked a single box of books, I deserve this. I am SO glad I bought it. It is a masterpiece of weird adventures. Obviously, I find myself attracted to the stories.
My favorite so far was when Sloane (the author), a nice Jewish girl, went to Christian summer camp. They had Christmas in July and all sorts of other wacky fun, but the best was when the girls gathered at night to say their prayers by the light of torches.
Now, the javelinahunt this October is going to feature torches made from giant marshmallow puffies, but these kids at camp had an even better idea. Methinks I will run it by the committee to see if this is something we might consider for our planned Saturday night run through the streets of Tombstone in hot pursuit of the elusive javelina.
Instead of giant puffies, the girls dipped huge overnight-sized maxi pads in some sort of tar substance and set them aflame! They then prayed and chanted and held their torches aloft as they prayed to become virtuous.
I...am...so....IMPRESSED! Can you imagine how long those suckers would burn? We could replicate an honest hue and cry with flaming torches like that!
Now, I too have had alternative uses for giant sanitary pads, but I have never dipped them into a tar-like substance and used them as torch heads. When my cousin Corky got hit in the head playing softball, we staunched the gaping wound over his left eye with a giant sanitary napkin. Since it was an overnighter pad, it was long enough for us to simply tie the whole damn thing around his head. We told him he looked cool - like the guy in the picture of the soldiers limping home from war. He was the guy playing the fife.
